#17: Hold a Live Alligator

Me and Rick

OK, I must admit that even I questioned whether or not this should count as a 40x40. Yes, I held a live alligator, BUT it was at a tourist attraction called AlligatorAlley in Alabama, the gator’s mouth was taped shut and most of the other handlers were young kids.

In fact, it was at the request of my kids that I even considered this. They both held the two-year old alligator named Oreo – Luca even hugged him. But I was perfectly content simply snapping pictures from a distance. I’m not a fan of reptiles. Recently a baby lizard in our house made me scream like a baby.

Luca hugging Oreo

Sensing my fear, Maya and Luca used kid-pressure (perhaps even stronger than peer pressure) to get me to try. “He’s really nice,” said Luca. “Even that toddler held him,” said Maya. And to seal the deal Maya added, “You can use it as a 40x40 experience.”

Given I turn 40 in February 2015 and this is only experience #15, you can see I’m a little behind. I have great intentions, but the craziness of life often gets in the way of this project. So, I caved and agreed to hold Oreo.

Me holding Oreo

He felt slimy and icky. REALLY SLIMY AND ICKY. I think he even glared at me, sensing my fear and trying to intimidate. I felt a little sad for him being passed around with his mouth taped shut until another tourist pointed out that he’d be content to rip off my arms if he had the chance.

I held him for what seemed like an eternity.  In reality, it was probably closer to 15 seconds, and I handed him back to the staff member.

There, I did it. And it counts.

Gator Feeding Show

I must admit that aside from my uncertainty with Oreo, I was impressed by the overall swamp experience. We progressed thru the park seeing gators from infants to adults. There was even a feeding show where the staff handed gators raw meat treats. It was fascinating to gain this perspective on an animal I have never really thought much about…although I think I did eat alligator at a Cajun restaurant once…

Only 23 experiences to go…

#16: Parasailing

Like my recent sushi-eating experience, parasailing was one of the items on my original 40x40 target list as my overall intent with this project was to try new things, push myself out of my comfort zone and have more fun.

I was excited to finally have the opportunity to cross parasailing off the list while on vacation last week in Gulf Shores, Alabama. I had hoped it would be a family adventure, but due to an arm injury my oldest daughter, Maya, was unable to participate. Instead she and my husband, Rick, stayed at the beach while my seven year old, Luca, and I headed into the sky.

I did consider holding off since we couldn’t all do it together – and maybe because I was a little nervous. I have fears of water, heights and sharks, and I’ve seen some crazy news stories of parasailing experiences gone wrong.  But an excited Luca said, “It’s ok to be a little scared,” and I figured if a seven year old was brave enough, I could do this too!

After a little online research we decided to go with Peridio Key Parasail since they had great reviews. Their website boasts, “You will parasail high above the Gulf of Mexico with our experienced team and advanced liftoff and landing technology…enjoy spectacular views of our emerald waters and tropical beaches.”

Luca and Me

That’s exactly what we experienced. We arrived mid-morning, signed a few disclaimers, put on life jackets and were quickly escorted via a fun banana boat ride to the parasailing boat. There we strapped on harnesses, got two minutes of instructions and were released into the air with a pastel-colored chute behind us. AND IT WAS AMAZING!

I’m really not sure how else to describe it: COMPLETELY AMAZING!

It was a smooth transition from the boat to the sky, and for about 10 minutes we sailed 400 feet above the surface enjoying the amazing Gulf Coast views. Smiling the entire time, we talked about how “cool” this was, looked for our condo, gazed up at the parachute, tried to find Rick and Maya on the beach, and even extended our arms and pretended to be flying like birds (Luca’s idea). AWESOMENESS.

Flying like Birds

It was a great adventure, and I realized how incredibly special it was to experience it through the eyes of a child. Had it been me alone, I’m fairly certain I would not have flapped my wings like a bird and I know I wouldn’t have giggled out loud when the escalation into the sky “tickled my tummy.” I wouldn’t have thought about looking for our sand castle on the beach or what would happen if we “landed next to a shark.”

Luca and I had a blast on our adventure. We’ve already decided to upgrade to the 800 ft. parasailing flight next year. Experience #16 was my favorite yet. Only 24 to go.

#15: Waffle House

While on a family road trip last week we made a point to have one meal at a Waffle House restaurant. Even though there’s one less than a mile from our house, I had never been to (or thought much about) Waffle House until last summer when we were on the same route to the Gulf Coast and passed what seemed like a hundred of them driving through Louisiana and Mississippi. I had always written the restaurant off as a greasy travel stop frequented by truck drivers, but the abundance of them peeked my curiosity. 

So I committed to my family that we would try it sometime during our vacation. I think we were all a little reluctant – well, except for Luca, my 7 year old, who gets excited about pretty much EVERYTHING. In fact, we might have changed our minds and skipped the adventure all together had Luca not constantly reminded us “you said we get to eat at Waffle House sometime” before every meal.

Luca (left), Maya and Rick (right).

We finally took the plunge and stopped for lunch at a Waffle House in Gulfport, Mississippi. After we chose a booth in the center of the diner, I took a second to absorb the surroundings. Despite numerous flies circling the area, I was surprised with what I saw. The restaurant was relatively clean, my kids loved watching food being prepared on the grill beside us, there was a jukebox along the wall and lots of signs navigating customers through the “experience.”

A friendly employee immediately approached our table to take drink orders, and we explored the menu. I typically make pretty healthy selections at restaurants, but that wasn’t an option here so I decided to give in to the experience and try the grilled chicken bacon melt and hash browns “diced.”

Hashbrown Menu

I learned that while it may be called the “Waffle” House, people go for the hashbrowns. There’s a whole list of add-ons each with a specific description to order with. Mine were perfect with just grilled tomatoes, but my husband, Rick,  ordered his “covered and topped” meaning served with melted cheese and chili. I had a few bites and they were pretty amazing although I may have added “peppered” to the list if I had ordered them.

My chicken melt was surprisingly delicious, and the kids enjoyed their meals too. Of course they each opted for the chocolate chip waffle, so I guess it’s hard to go wrong there.

A quick review of our visit…

Service was great.

Restaurant was relatively clean.

Food was actually delicious.

Experience was unique and fun.

I’d go back…and Luca has actually asked to go back at every meal since we left.

Only 25 new experiences to go…

#14: Sushi

One of the 40x40 experiences on my original target list was to eat sushi – or more accurately perhaps, to eat sashimi. I recently learned the difference in the two terms that I always assumed were interchangeable. Sashimi is thin slices of raw meat served without rice vs. sushi that is vinegared rice mixed with other ingredients, which may or may not include raw fish.

For years I have enjoyed going to sushi restaurants with friends and coworkers but I’ve always stuck to cooked rolls. Not being overly adventurous, I enjoy California rolls, spicy California rolls, rolls with tempura shrimp or salmon, avocado, etc. I do eat them with chopsticks and with ginger, wasabi and soy sauce, but I’ve never moved beyond items specifically marked “fully cooked.”

My plan for 40x40 was to finally try the raw stuff. Lots of people love it and I’ve always been curious what they’re raving about. But the last few times I’ve had the opportunity to try it, I haven’t been quite brave enough. Something about the look and perceived texture scared me. That finally changed last week while I was at a healthcare conference in Vancouver.

After a day of learning sessions followed by sightseeing, two colleagues and I had dinner at a great Asian restaurant called Guu. Self proclaimed as ‘the izakaya pioneer with the Japanese spirit in Canada,’ Guu has six locations in Vancouver and two in Toronto. We visited the Roboson location, a small but very energetic restaurant downtown. We opted to share a number of appetizers and entrees including calamari, edamame, ochazuke (rice soup mixed with cooked salmon) and salmon sashimi.

Honestly, I would have been fine with only the other selections, but my persuasive company encouraged me to try the sashimi. Since I had referenced 40x40 earlier and how the craziness of life has caused me to slip behind on my year long project, they knew how to convince me. I reluctantly took a bite gently dipped in soy sauce, admittedly small, but still a bite. Despite my apprehension (it looked slimy and, well, raw), it was delicious and flavorful.  In fact, I look forward to trying more soon. I may opt for the raw sushi next time though – the combination of fish with rice sounds even better to me.

Experience #14 was sort of planned yet unexpected and that made it a little extra fun. Only 26 to go…

#13: Horse-drawn Wagon Ride thru Stanley Park

Last week I had the privilege of attending a conference in Vancouver, BC, Canada that focused on collaboration and partnership in healthcare safety, quality and experience. It was a great event hosted by a respected organization in patient and family centered care. In addition to representing my organization and the patient experience movement, I had the opportunity to participate in many fabulous sessions and learn from organizations that are including and embracing the voices of patients and families in the evolution of healthcare.

To be honest, that has little to do with this blog post or experience #11, but it sets the stage for why I was in Canada and gives me a chance to promote the amazing work I am fortunate to be involved in.

A bonus for the trip - I had an open afternoon/evening to explore Vancouver and I was excited to do so with a newfound friend/colleague, Martha. She and I walked from the conference hotel, past a fleet of yachts and breathtaking scenery to the beautiful Stanley Park, a 1,001- acre public park that borders downtown Vancouver and is almost entirely surrounded by waters of the Pacific Ocean.

We missed the last boat tour of the afternoon so instead opted for a horse-drawn wagon tour through the park, a much slower-paced but enjoyable option. Two rookie horses (it was their first week on the tour circuit) pulled our wagon of 18 tourists and one guide up and down the roads of Stanley Park. That’s still incomprehensible to me… two average sized horses pulled EIGHTEEN PEOPLE in a wagon up and down hills. I admit, I felt guilty for allowing them to do this, but we were assured they were well cared for and they appeared to actually enjoy the adventure. 

We stopped to walk thru the famous Totem Poles, rode pass the Girl in a Wet Suit Statue, saw the S.S. Empress of Japan Figurehead and ended near the Rose Garden. There Martha and I opted to pop into Stanley’s at the pavilion for wine and a chance to enjoy the beautiful weather and surroundings. It was a great afternoon.

After the walk back to the hotel, we met another colleague and headed to dinner, an adventure in itself…so much so that I’ll save it for post #14. Only 27 new experiences to go!

#12: Night at a Children's Hospital

The 40x40 project was intended to encourage me out of my comfort zone to try new things, meet new people and increase my overall knowledge. All of the experiences to date were fun opportunities to do just that, but this one is different. It certainly was not planned and definitely not fun, but (supporting my tagline above), it did somehow enrich my life, deepen my soul and reinforce my purpose.

Last week my daughter, Maya, dislocated and fractured her elbow while practicing at her cheer gym (ironically you can learn more about that in my recent tamale blog). She had an emergency reduction surgery the night of the accident to put her elbow back in place and a second surgery a few days later to insert a screw to correct the fracture. All went well, but they decided to keep her overnight to help control her pain. And that’s where my 40x40 experience comes in.

Certainly staying overnight at the hospital with a recovering child is something any mother would do and there is absolutely no place I would have been that night except by her side. But it was especially enlightening for me as a person who has built a career in patient experience. I work for The Beryl Institute, a thought leader and community of practice on improving patient experience in healthcare. While I build and promote resources to help our community improve the experiences of patients, families and caregivers, I’ve been blessed to have very few patient/family experiences myself. It’s amazing how your perspective changes when you’re sitting inside the hospital walls. So, for this 40x40 I’d like to take a different approach and share a few of the realizations I faced while caring for Maya.

• Patients (and those who love and care for them) are incredibly vulnerable in a healthcare setting. I think Maya and I are pretty confident in our regular routines, but we were a bit clueless at the hospital – even with simple things such as ordering meals and turning on the TV. More significantly, we were at the hands of the staff to know what medicines she should have, if her body was reacting as it should to the surgery and how to best control the pain. We had to trust the healthcare team. As a children’s hospital, I must acknowledge they had several things in place that helped Maya feel more comfortable. Volunteers brought her a stuffed lamb and they let her select from a fun collection of super soft blankets to use while there that she could also take home. The hospital even had a Build-a-Bear Workshop on site, which I believe was the key motivator in getting her walking around post-surgery.

• Healthcare workers are human. I think we often place doctors and nurses on pedestals in our minds assuming they should have perfect accuracy, bedside manners and responsiveness. While Maya had some great people caring for her, I was quickly reminded they were human. They had varied levels of experience, focus and relationship skills. As humans they also had their own lives that did have an impact on how they cared for my daughter – maybe stresses at home, conflict with co-workers or even their own health challenges. Regardless of how dedicated and professional, humans make mistakes. I came to appreciate all the checks and balances they implemented to help prevent that. At first I was a little disturbed by the redundant questions like “What is your name? Birthday? Any allergies?” But as I reminded myself the staff were each caring for multiple patients, I learned to appreciate their diligence to make sure everything matched up. That said, I do suggest they reconsider one phrase in their vernacular. From the time we registered for surgery until we left the next day, we had at least 10 people ask, “What are you here for?” That’s a perfectly fair question for someone showing up at the Emergency Department or having a random appointment at their physician’s office, but there is an expectation when you arrive somewhere for a scheduled surgery that they are expecting you and know why you’re there. I suggest a simple, “I see you are here for ______. Is that correct?” as an alternative as it would go a long way in giving patients confidence in their healthcare team.

• Patients need advocates. The vulnerability and realization that the staff treating Maya were human reinforced a point I hear a lot in my work – the idea that patients need advocates. A few years ago a co-worker’s husband was in the hospital and she refused to leave his side. As much as she respected the healthcare team caring for him, she realized no one had his best interest at heart as much as she did. She was there to be sure they gave him the right medicines, at the right time and in the right amounts. She kept a journal of his condition and symptoms to share with the doctor, and she was there to be sure he ate, had food choices he liked and any assistance he needed. After being in the hospital with Maya for just one night, I understood her point completely, and not just because Maya was 11. If I’m ever in the hospital, or my husband, parents or sister are, I hope we’ll have the ability to have a personal advocate by our side.

Maya was lucky that her hospital stay was short and she’s on the road to recovery. Being with her that night did enrich my life by giving me a more personal reflection on something I speak to everyday. And that reinforces my purpose, both as a mom caring for a child and a professional passionate about making the healthcare experience the best it can be for everyone. 

Experience #12 taught me lots, but I hope and pray the next 28 get back to planned fun, adventure and new encounters.

#11: Learn to Make Tamales

Tamale in Process

Learning to make tamales was on my original list for the 40x40 project. I love them but have always heard what a labor of love they are to make. I wanted to experience that for myself, so my husband and I signed up for a tamale class at Central Market.

We dropped the kids off for open tumbling at their cheer gym and were excited to enjoy a mini date at the cooking school. Once we got there, washed up and put on our aprons, the instructors introduced themselves and asked all of the participants to share why they joined the class. My answer was simple, “I’ve just always wanted to learn how to make tamales.”  The head instructor chuckled and responded, “Well, you’ll never want to make them again after this. They’re so not worth all of the effort.”

And with that, my enthusiasm was deflated. In my head I was thinking, “Can we please have our $120 back?” Seriously, I have no problem putting in a little effort for great food, but if that’s the instructor’s attitude, why do they even offer the class?

Anyway, I brushed it off and focused on learning the proper way to lay the corn husks, press the masa and add the chicken and pork mixtures. I was a little disappointed that much of the pre-work was already done since I really was hoping for the made-from-scratch experience, but I guess that was necessary given the two-hour time frame.

Rick enjoying the wine
and borracho beans

Once we prepared the tamales and the instructor took them to the steamer, the class gathered around a table where we were served wine and an appetizer of borracho beans. We listened to the teachers describe how they made the beans. Again, that was a little disappointing since I was expecting a hands-on class, but the flavors were so amazing that I quickly got caught up in reading the recipe and thinking about how I could replicate the taste at home…and that’s when the entire night changed.

I pulled out my phone and noticed a missed call and voicemail from the cheer gym. Maya had an accident on the trampoline. Of course as a parent there’s always an initial panic when you hear something like that, but in all honesty, I wasn’t overly concerned. Maya is a bit accident-prone and this wasn’t the first time we were contacted about an incident at cheer. I encouraged Rick to stay at the cooking school while I ran over to check things out.

Maya's disfigured arm...ouch!

It turned out to be a much bigger deal than I expected. Maya had actually dislocated and fractured her elbow. Needless to say I never made it back to tamale class. Instead we rushed from an urgent care clinic to Cook Children’s Hospital in downtown Fort Worth where at about 1 AM Maya had the first of several surgeries to repair her elbow.

Rick stayed thru the end of the class since he was stranded there without a car and met up with us on the way downtown. At least he was able to bring home samples from the class and I did get to try one of the tamales the next day.

Experience #11 definitely did not go as planned. I did learn a little and the tamales were good, but in hindsight I wish we had stayed home and had a family movie night on the couch that evening. It could have saved a lot of pain, drama and expense.